


Hard to Let Go

by dessertmeltdown



Category: Firefly
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-21
Updated: 2012-01-21
Packaged: 2017-10-29 21:26:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/324326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dessertmeltdown/pseuds/dessertmeltdown
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s hard now, even after all this time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hard to Let Go

Kaylee still had a hard time being in the same room as the captain and Simon most of the time. It’s not that she didn’t still love them both. She did, but it still hurt to see them together after everything that had happened. She had thought that she and Simon were happy.

Even after all the time that had past, she still wasn’t sure what had gone wrong. It seemed, to her, like one day they were just as happy as could be, smilin’ and laughin’. She’d even thought they might end up married one day in the not too distant future.

And then one day, didn’t even seem long after it had all begun, everything came crashing down around her. There was fight, and now she can’t even remember what started it, no matter how hard she tried. She isn’t sure she really wants to, honestly. But they’d broken up because of it, and eventually she just stopped trying to fix it.

She sometimes thought it was her fault. She wondered what she could have done to make things different, to be a better person for Simon, but she knew she didn’t do anything wrong. Not that she blamed him either. Weren’t no one’s fault, not really. Not what happened with them. Some things don’t work out, and it had just take a lot of pain for her to realize that her relationship with Simon was going to be one of those things.

That realization hadn’t made it any easier, months and months later, when she saw them together. Simon and Mal. They didn’t know she was there, and she hadn’t seen much, but she’d seen enough. She never told them she’d walked in on them like that. She didn’t think it was worth it, really, and she didn’t want to cause any problems, ‘specially if they wanted to keep it a secret.

And she had to admit, it helped when Simon came to her and told her she was the first to know. He’d wanted her to find out from him and not someone else. She smiled and told him she wanted him to be happy. It wasn’t a lie. Not at all. It still hurt. Still hurt then. Still hurt now.

Everyone on the ship knew within a few days. Hard to keep a secret when you lived in such a small area. They weren’t ever obvious. She was sure it was for her benefit. But even now, a few months after all of that, it was hard for her to see them together. She still loved Simon, more than she even wanted to, and she wasn’t sure she’d ever stop.

Oh, she was all kindsa happy for him and the captain, but she’d never really given up the hope that someday they might just fix things.

Simon laughed at something Mal said on the other end of the table. Jayne made some crude joke. Kaylee forced a laugh.

They never knew how much it hurt her. She never wanted them to.


End file.
